Living Like An Egyptian
by Amarin Rose
Summary: Pairings: Various Het-Yaoi Summary: Soap opera drama meets slapstick comedy in ancient Egypt. It is the reign of the just-crowned Pharaoh Atemu, and these are the crazy days - and people - of his life at court.
1. Unscheduled Problems

**Unscheduled Problems**

* * *

"So, what's on the agenda for today?"

A rustle of papyrus greeted his ears. "You have to dedicate the new temple to Bastet, then oversee the building of a new tomb…"

"But no one's died recently," Pharaoh Atemu objected.

Seto, High Priest to the just-crowned Pharaoh Atemu – better known to his friends as 'that cactus thorn in my side' – sighed and lowered the scroll. "It's for you, Atem," he grumbled. "Your father did the same thing when he was first crowned – you supervise the building of the tomb you will one day inhabit."

Atemu grimaced. "Isn't that rather morbid?"

Seto shrugged. "It's supposed to be good luck and ensure you a long and happy reign."

Atemu blinked. "Well, I suppose I need all the help I can get, considering…"

Sighing, Seto threw the scroll onto a nearby table. He knew they wouldn't get anywhere while this problem still weighed heavily on Atemu's mind. "Atem, you have two choices," he said bluntly.

Atemu blinked. "Two? Really?"

Seto nodded. "Yes. You can either get over the fact that Kisara is getting married to him and stop moping – or have him killed," he said bluntly.

Atemu growled and buried his head in his hands. Thankfully he had taken his spiked crown off earlier in the day or this could have resulted in bloody fingers on his part. "I could never do that – he doesn't deserve it."

Seto shrugged. "Then have the other one killed."

"I can't do that," Atemu said, aghast. "Ryou would never forgive me if I killed his brother."

"But you don't want him to marry your sister," Seth pointed out.

Atemu grimaced. "Falling in love is one thing, but I just don't see why she had to take up with…with…**him**! It could only be worse if she'd taken up with his brother."

Seto rolled his eyes. His cousin was **such** a drama queen. "My lord, your theatrics do not impress me."

Atemu huffed and raised his head. "Like you like it any better. Kisara is your sister too; she means just as much to me as she does to you – and she's engaged to the brother of a **tomb-robber**."

Seto snorted. "Bakura may be a tomb-robber, but Ryou is the palace artist. You can't very well hold the boy's relations against him."

Atemu gave him a look. "Maybe not, but still…"

"You could forbid it," Seto pointed out. "Your word is law. If you forbid her from marrying him, then she can't."

"Yes, but if Kisara isn't married by next season, then my advisors will try to pawn her off on **me**," Atemu said, aghast. "I love my sister – but no way."

Seto shuddered at the thought. Being forced to marry was bad enough – being forced to marry a close relative?

Their sibling rivalry was bad enough, but if Atemu and Kisara were married…

He'd be dead within a week.

"The only thing that would be worse is if I was forced to marry **you**," Atemu said laughingly.

Seth sniffed. "I'm not **that** bad," he grumbled.

"No, you're worse," Jou said, poking his head into the room.

Seto grumbled subvocally. "What are you doing here, mutt?"

Jou frowned at the High Priest's supercilious air – and the nickname the brunet had saddled him with. "It's time for our Morning Star to shine on the lowly barracks," he said haughtily.

Atemu blinked. "Huh?"

Jou chuckled. "Today's the day you appoint the new Captain of the Royal Army, Pharaoh 'Temu."

"That wasn't on the agenda," Atemu scolded his cousin.

Seto twitched. "You never let me finish."

Atemu blushed. "Oh."

Seto shook his head and sighed. "All right, mutt, you've done your job and fetched us." He waved the blonde soldier away. "We're coming. Run along back to your littermates now."

Jou growled at the insults and stalked out of the room, muttering under his breath about a 'conceited ass – with a face like one, too.'

"You should be nicer to him, Seth," Atemu scolded. He rose with a sigh from his throne and grimaced before plopping his hated and heavy crown back on his head.

Seth scoffed as he followed his Pharaoh out of the room. "Why? He's just a common foot soldier."

Atemu raised a brow. "He's also my friend. Just like you."

Seth grumbled, but was unable to reply to that.

Atemu shook his head and headed down the stairs to the barracks. "I do have one question, though," he said when they were almost at the bottom.

"What's that?" Seth asked curiously.

"Who am I appointing as the new Captain of the Guard?" Atemu asked.

Seth groaned and buried his face in his hands. It was just **not** his day.


	2. Crazy Like Usual

**Crazy Like Usual**

* * *

"I can't believe you did that!" Seth exclaimed, a pained grimace on his face as he held a cold damp cloth to a rapidly-purpling bruise on his forehead.

"You can't believe I've done a lot of things," Atemu said laughingly, though he winced as a twinge from his shoulder reminded him that he'd pulled a muscle.

"Like what?" Shizuka asked. She tossed the Pharaoh a towel to wipe himself off with and set to work doctoring his scrapes.

"Where should I start?" Seth asked fatalistically.

"How about the beginning?" Shizuka suggested, smiling cheekily as she applied salve to the friction burn on the High Priest's arm.

Hissing under his breath at the sting, Seth nonetheless nodded. "The beginning, then," he agreed.

"That would be yesterday, I believe," Atemu supplied helpfully.

Glaring at his Pharaoh, Seth gave another curt nod and started talking. "Yesterday our most esteemed Morning Star commissioned the royal painter to make a vase," Seth said, tone grievously pained.

Pausing in the middle of tying a bandage around the Pharaoh's leg, Shizuka blinked up at the High Priest. "What's wrong with that?" the girl asked guilelessly. "It's Noah's job – well, one of them, anyway – to make new pottery, isn't it?"

Growling, Seth turned away without answering the young redhead's question.

Atemu chuckled. "Instead of the typical depiction of Horus killing Set, I asked Noah to adorn this vase with a picture of the time Queen Mai defeated Seth in a training exercise."

Shizuka giggled at the expression of murderous rage that crossed Seth's face. "Where are you going to put it?" she asked.

"Mai's birthday is coming up. Being an Amazon, I thought she'd appreciate it," Atemu said cannily.

"I think you're right," Shizuka said, stifling yet another laugh as Seth turned his glare on her. Unlike her brother, the blue-eyed brunet **did** intimidate her – a little. Neatly changing the subject, she asked, "So, how did you two end up like this, anyway?" She gestured to their scraped, bruised, bloodied, wet, mud-splattered, and generally filthy state. "Get in a bar brawl?" she asked facetiously; her brother and Honda were the only two men in the palace who regularly got into fights. Normally with each other.

"Close," Atemu admitted. "Seth let Jou challenge him to a sparring match and I got sucked into the ensuing army-wide conflagration."

Shizuka blinked at the discomfited priest. "Why would you do a stupid thing like that?" she demanded, momentarily forgetting her fear of the man.

"I **beg** your pardon, Healer Jounouchi?" Seth blustered, using her full title to let the younger girl know she was in hot water.

Glaring at the older man, Shizuka refused to back down, though she did quail inwardly at the thought of just how much she'd wish her soul to be damned to Amut if Seth decided to make her life not worth living. "Jou is one of the two best fighters in the Pharaoh's Army; he's almost equal in ability to Queen Mai, and we all **know** you can't beat her. Why would you accept an offer to spar with him? You know you'd lose."

"Ah, my dear, I am afraid you've lived a sheltered life here in the palace," Atemu bemoaned theatrically. He grinned wickedly at his High Priest. "It is amazing the things a man's pride will force him to do."

"Pride goeth before a fall," Shizuka said bluntly.

"Or, in this case, a push," Atemu rejoined.

Shizuka just raised one scarlet brow in inquiry.

"The push Honda gave me to send me into the fight," Atemu explained. "If I hadn't gotten shoved into the fight, I wouldn't have ended up with a sprained ankle. If I hadn't sprained my ankle I wouldn't have had to come here along with Seth to see you." Atemu smiled charmingly at the young girl, receiving a smile and a headshake for his troubles.

Seth just seethed silently; he'd both failed to defeat Katsuya Jounouchi in battle, and to protect his Pharaoh from said altercation. This was **not** his day.

"What am I going to do with the two of you?" Shizuka chided, shaking her, hands on her hip. She was the perfect picture of motherly discontent.

Smiling weakly, Atemu said, "Leave us here to recuperate and go congratulate your brother and Honda?"

Shizuka blinked. "Congratulate them? What for?" she asked warily.

"They're the new **co**-Captains of the Guard," Seth said, his tone indicating that he wasn't pleased by that fact. In truth, he'd lobbied for Honda to be put in the charge of the Army, for no other reason than he **really** didn't like Jou. He and the blond 'mutt' as he called him, did not get along at all; never had, in fact.

But if he were to be objective about it, Jou and Honda **were** their two best fighters, and each had their strengths in the leadership department. By themselves they were fantastic; together, the Egyptian Army would be nigh unbeatable.

And how it galled him to admit that, even to himself.

Jaw dropping open in undisguised horror, Shizuka squeaked out, "You put my **brother** and **Honda** in charge of the Royal Guard? Have you taken leave of your senses?"

Atemu frowned; normally if Shizuka had a problem with one of his decisions she was a bit more tactful in saying so. This news must have really shaken her. "What do you mean?" he asked warily.

Realizing that she was coming perilously close to overstepping her bounds – not that Pharaoh Atemu was much for formality – Shizuka bowed lowly, chagrined. "My apologies for my behaviors, my Pharaoh, I was startled. I beg your forgiveness." She was laying it on a little thick, but one could never be too careful.

Even if they were a favored servant of the Pharaoh himself. But then, Pharaoh Atemu was unusual in many ways, not the least of which being his befriending of all the lesser members of his 'court.'

"Quite all right, Shizuka, but what's got you so out of sorts?" Atemu asked, frowning in puzzlement. "I would have thought you'd be happy for your brother."

Shizuka smiled weakly. "I love my brother – and Honda – and they are good fighters, but…"

"But?" Atemu prompted gently.

Exhaling loudly, Shizuka said, "But what makes you think that giving them this kind of authority isn't going to cause more problems than they fix?"

"What do you mean?" Seth asked impatiently.

"Jou and Honda are the two biggest pranksters in all of Kemet. Together they've caused more havoc than when Mana was practicing casting love spells. And now you've given them free rein of the palace," Shizuka said, her hands climbing over each other like fretful mice.

Atemu gazed at his cousin – and top advisor – aghast. "How could you forget to remind me of that fact?" he demanded.

Seth stared disbelievingly at his Pharaoh. "He's **your** friend, sire," he pointed out. "It's my job to advise you; not to make your decisions for you," he said bluntly. "It isn't my fault if you happened to forget the most annoying personality trait that your best friends possess."

Atemu gulped and chuckled weakly. "Er…oops?" he offered.

Seth glared at his cousin. "Oops, sire? This is a bit more than a mere 'oops.' Things are already crazy enough around here without those two on the loose."

"High Priest Seth has a point, your majesty," Shizuka said reluctantly. "Since Jou and Honda are in charge now, they can delegate their responsibilities and have more time to think up pranks."

Atemu whimpered at the very thought. "We're doomed," he proclaimed fatalistically.

"Indeed," Seth agreed darkly, irritation sparking in his eyes. _Things will be even crazier than usual around here,_ he thought.

_Not that that's anything new._


	3. Wedded Bliss?

**Wedded…Bliss?**

* * *

"It's done."

Seth nodded once. "Yes, sire."

"Kisara and Ryou are married," Atemu went on as if he hadn't heard his High Priest's words.

"And the wedding was beautiful," Shizuka said as she and Anzu walked past. "So beautiful." She sighed dreamily.

"Simply divine," Anzu agreed. "A ceremony fit for the Gods," she proclaimed.

Once the two girls were out of hearing range, Atemu said, "And it went off without a hitch. No assassination attempts, no fights, no uninvited guests, no…thefts." He grimaced as if he'd swallowed a lemon whole. "I suppose we have Bakura and his…connections…to thank for that?" he sighed.

"Indubitably, sire," Seth agreed, an odd light entering his eyes.

"Though I'm sure you'd know more about that than I," Atemu continued blithely, slanting his cousin a sideways glance full of knowing.

Seth stiffened and turned slowly to face his Pharaoh. "What do you mean?" he asked stiffly.

"I saw you and…Bakura…making out in the alcove next to the wine barrels," Atemu said, expression somewhere between loathing for Seth's choice in kissing partner, and mocking laughter of a younger brother for his older brother that he'd caught his normally prissy High Priest with his pants down.

Figuratively speaking, anyway. Seth had worn his normal robes of state to the wedding; they didn't include pants.

"I…um…well, er…ah…" Seth stuttered, unable to come up with anything to say in response.

Atemu wasn't about to let his High Priest stew over wondering if he'd be thrown in the dungeon for treason – but that didn't mean he wasn't going to needle his cousin. "If you'd spoken up about your relationship with Bakura sooner we could have had a double ceremony this afternoon."

Seto started, eyes wild and wide. He finally managed to get out at least one coherent word. "What!"

"You could have gotten married at the same time as Ryou and Kisara," Atemu explained, grinning inwardly at the anxious look on Seth's face. Oh, teasing his cousin was fun. He hadn't enjoyed himself this much in ages.

"Why would we – I – want to do that?" Seth demanded testily, stepping up onto the throne's platform so he could look down at his younger cousin, instead of **up** at him.

"Because you loved him?" Atemu said, keeping his mirth in check and purposely making himself sound unsure; more like he was asking a question rather than making a statement.

"I wouldn't go that far," Seth blustered.

"Oh?" There was a wealth of meaning in that one syllable.

"I have developed a certain…fondness…for Bakura," Seth admitted grudgingly.

Atemu snorted indelicately. "You've developed a 'certain fondness' for foreign chocolates, Seth." His look and tone turned contemplative. "Though from the few seconds of that kiss I caught, you certainly were **devouring** him like one." He gave a cat-got-the-cream smile.

Glaring murderously at his Pharaoh, Seth sulked his way down to sit in a chair next to the throne's dais.

"Now, Seth, don't be like that," Atemu chided teasingly.

"I do not exist solely for your amusement, **Sire**," Seth said, tone brittle as he emphasized his cousin's title. It still irritated him that Atemu's mother had been the Pharaoh's first wife; even though Seth had been born first – to the Pharaoh's brother's wife, who later became the Pharaoh's second wife upon the death of her husband. Kisara and Mokuba were the joint offspring of Seth's mother and the Pharaoh – he would not be able to attain the throne unless he assassinated his cousin. And while Seth might have been more fond of Mokuba and Kisara, he and Atemu did love each other as well.

Even though neither of them ever showed it.

"I wasn't trying to make fun of you," Atmeu argued.

"Oh?"

"I was trying to get you to loosen up!" Atemu exclaimed. "Yes, I don't like Bakura, but if he makes you happy, I'm not going to say nay." He tilted his head to the side in thought. "Unless he steals something exceedingly important; then I'll let Marik practice his torture procedures on him for an afternoon."

Seth shivered at the thought of the psychotic Royal Executioner. "You will not!" he shouted, whirling around to glare at his cousin, fire and brimstone in his normally calm and implacable eyes.

"I won't?" Atemu asked mildly.

"No, you won't," Seth said firmly.

"You're finally growing a backbone," Atemu said in approval. He smiled. "I like it."

Seth rolled his eyes and perched on the arm of Atemu's throne. "Anything else you'd like to test the bonds of my sanity with, sire?"

"Well, since you asked…"

Seth's eye twitched. "Yes, Sire?"

"Since you and Kisara each ended up with one half of a set of brothers, maybe Mokuba and I will end up with a pair of sisters?" Atemu said jokingly.

Rolling his eyes, Seth returned easily, "Why yes, Sire, entirely possible." He grinned demonically. "Mokuba could end up with Princess Edina and you could marry Mai; become the very first **King** of the Amazons."

Horrified, Atemu said, "Bite your tongue, Seth." He felt no shame in admitting that Queen Mai almost scared his ba away from his ka. She was a wonderful woman, but too demanding and domineering to make a good wife to the Pharaoh of Kemet.

"I'd rather bite Bakura's," Seth said brazenly.

Atemu's noise of disgust was matched by another, high-pitched one.

"Ew!" came the disgusted scream of a pre-adolescent girl. Edina, having exchanged her formal wedding toga for the usual leather and linen armor of an Amazon warrior in training, a wild-eyed look on her face, ran into the throne room and skidded to a stop in front of Atemu and Seth. "He **kissed** me!" she shrieked in outrage.

"Who did?" Seth and Atemu asked in unison.

"Your brother," she spat out. The word 'brother' was said in the same way that Atemu said Bakura's name, as if the word were synonymous with 'shit.'

The slap of sandals against the floor heralded the arrival of the kisser in question and Mokuba panted to a stop a few feet from Edina. "Why'd you run away?" he asked her, bafflement clear on his face.

"Why do you **think**?" she shouted at him, wiping her lips with the back of one hand as a reminder.

"Hey, the kiss was **your** idea," he replied, pointing one accusing finger at her. Blushing at the scrutiny he was under from his two older half-brothers, he mentally vowed to hide frogs in their beds if they said anything. It **sucked** being the youngest sometimes.

Put off-balance by that reminder, she skittered away from his out-stretched arm. "Well, you didn't have to **enjoy** it so much," she argued, slightly shaken.

"You didn't have to **slap** me!" he shouted back.

"Children, children," Ishuzu said, appearing as if from out of nowhere. Knowing her, it was entirely possible. She was the Palace Seer, and as such could tell the future. While she claimed it was the magic of her Millennium Tauk, showing her what might be, most of the palace servants speculated as to whether or not she just didn't eavesdrop on everyone; she was also known as the Palace Gossip. "You shouldn't fight; especially over something in which no one is too blame," she remonstrated them. She grabbed them both gently by their arms and proceeded to drag them out of the throne room, scolding them with each step, her words echoing off the walls. "Now, normally I'd suggest you kiss and make up, but…"

Exchanging disbelieving looks as the two pre-teens and the Seer exited the room, Atemu said to Seth, "No way. I don't care if Mokuba and Edina **do** get together. I'll become gay before I marry Mai." He shuddered at the thought.

"Don't speak too soon, Sire," Seth drawled. "I said the very same thing – and look who I ended up with."

Atemu groaned and buried his face his hands. "Why me?" he beseeched the Gods.

Somewhere, far off in the deepest, darkest depths of the Shadow Realm, Isis, Goddess of Marriage, laughed and shook her head, beaded braids tinkling. "Because you're so much fun to play with," she answered, despite the fact that the boy-king couldn't hear her. "And now that I've set my namesake on the path of getting those two young ones together…" she bared her teeth in a smirking smile, "…it's your turn, oh King of the Shadow Games."


	4. Palace Pets

**Palace Pets**

* * *

**Egyptian**

Miw-sher – Kitten

* * *

"Prince Atemu?" came a small voice.

A genuine smile crossed the Pharaoh's face. "Yes, Mana?" he inquired gently of the young blonde girl whose head was poked around the corner. "What can I do for you?"

Mana giggled at the overly formal voice he'd adopted. She was Mahaado's apprentice, true, but that didn't require the **Pharaoh** of all people to be so respectful of her. "I found somptin'."

Seth blanched. "Dear Ra…that bodes ill for my sanity," he muttered.

Atemu snickered. "What's left of it," he mumbled under his breath – but still loud enough for his High Priest to hear.

Seth glared at the Pharaoh.

"What is it that you found, Mana?" Atemu asked.

Mana tucked her hands behind her back and shuffled her feet. "Well…it's more like somptin' found me."

Seth buried his head in his hands. Those close to him could hear a mumbled, "Why me?" escape the confines of his hands.

"And what found you, Mana?" Atemu asked, exerting all of his never-extensive patience.

Mana giggled. "Kitty."

"A miw-sher?" Atemu asked, smiling.

Mana shook her head. "Nuh-uh. **Big** kitty. She found me in the Menagerie." Eyes bright, she asked, "Can I keep 'er?"

Atemu pretended to mull that over. "I'm not sure that Mahaado would let you have a pet–" though all present knew Mahaado was a sucker for the young blonde's big blue eyes, and she had him wrapped practically around her finger – along with the Pharaoh and pretty much any man in the palace save Seth and Marik, "–but if he says it's okay…" He trailed off suggestively.

She clapped her hands and jumped up and down in glee. "Yay! Thank you, Prince Atemu. I'll go get her and show you." She scampered off, presumably to do as stated.

Atemu shook his head and chuckled. Mana was barely twelve, but she was already one of the most winsome ladies of the court. When she grew up, her inherent charm and love of life would cause every man to fall at her feet.

Seth's eyes went wide as something occurred to him. "Sire…" he said slowly.

"Hmm?" Atemu asked distractedly.

"There are no lap cats in the Royal Menagerie," Seth stated. "The Royal Menagerie has only **wild** cats."

Atemu blinked, his brows knitting together. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that..."

Seth's words were interrupted by a large roar. A Black Panther stalked around the corner into the throne room, Mana holding onto the end of a **very** thin gold chain connected to an even thinner collar. The intricate adornments were obviously only for show, and only the feline's inherent goodwill was allowing the young girl to lead it around.

"Bastet, help us," Atemu prayed.

Seth blinked once, deliberately. "Indeed," he intoned.

Elsewhere, in the realm of the Gods, Bastet let out a throaty purr of a laugh. Isis had been right; these mortals were certainly fun.


	5. Weird Gifts Of Duality

**Weird Gifts Of Duality**

* * *

Ruby eyes stared down into violet.

Violet flinched, and turned away.

Ruby blinked and softened at this sign of fear, before turning towards stormy blue.

"I can hardly believe it," Atemu said, stunned.

"Neither can I, sire," Seth said, as he took in the sight of his cousin's shorter 'twin'. A foot shorter than the Pharaoh, with violet eyes instead of ruby, and plum streaks in his hair instead of scarlet, the timid boy could have been mistaken for Atemu's younger brother – disregarding the fact that Mokuba looked more like Seth than Atemu. The boy had been a gift from the Grecian monarchy. He was supposedly a bed slave, but considering how shy he was, he'd either been trained to just be submissive and follow orders instead of how to please in bed, or he hadn't been trained at all.

Seeing the nervousness inherent in the boy's posture, Seth thought it was most probably the latter.

"Just how narcissistic do the Greeks think I am?" Atemu demanded rhetorically.

Seth smirked, and opened his mouth to speak.

"Don't answer that!" the Pharaoh ordered his High Priest, glaring him down.

Seth subsided, but not without a fierce frown. Taunting his cousin was one of his favorite past times, and he didn't like having his fun taken away from him.

Getting up close and personal with Bakura was another favorite of his, but Bakura was currently across the Nile, trying to rob the tomb of a Nubian princess, and wouldn't be back to Egypt for weeks. Sexual frustration was making the usually taciturn High Priest even crankier than usual.

Seth rolled his eyes. "Yes, oh, Morning Star," he grumbled, sarcasm dripping from every syllable.

The boy quailed a bit in response to the tone in the High Priest's voice.

"Stop that, Seth; you're scaring him," Atemu chided, giving his short twin a soft smile. Said twin gave a tentative lopsided smile in return.

"If I'm not allowed to scare the slaves, then what do you want me to do?" Seth asked, eyes flashing with impatience. He'd accepted the delivery of this slave and taken the young boy to his recipient – the Pharaoh – despite the fact that it wasn't in his job description. But unfortunately, what with the former Pharaoh's funeral six months ago, Atemu's coronation five months ago, and the wedding two months ago – and the subsequent gifts, human, animal, vegetable, mineral and otherwise, in response to the last two events cluttering up the royal palace – there were many chores to be done, and not enough trusted personnel to do them. Seth, being both Atemu's High Priest and his personal advisor – the former Pharaoh's Royal Advisor was Solomon, who, though wise, was getting on in years and much preferred being behind the scenes in his old age rather than in the thick of things – had double the amount of responsibilities to worry about, and consequently very little free time. What he did have was either spent with Bakura, or insulting random palace-dwellers, from the lowliest kitchen maid up to and including his own cousin.

"Go find Anzu or Shizuka and see if they can find a room for this boy to stay in," Atemu told him. Left unsaid was the fact that having a younger, seemingly more innocent and less powerful and imposing version of the Pharaoh running around in the royal harem might prove too much temptation for some of the more…unintelligent servants, both male and female. Until Atemu decided what to do with the young boy, he would be closeted elsewhere so as to remain unmolested – or the offenders would suffer the consequences.

Defiling the Pharaoh's personal property – however much Atemu abhorred slavery, he could use this law to his advantage, since the boy was technically his 'property' – was punishable by anything from castration to death by hungry crocodile, depending on the Pharaoh's mood and mercifulness.

Atemu was not the King of the Shadow Games, the most deadly of all recreational endeavors, because he was a goody two-sandals.

Seth's eyes flashed and he grumbled, "What am I, your messenger boy?"

Atemu stopped short as he prepared to lob a scathing retort back at his invective-spewing cousin. "I could use one of those, couldn't I?" he mused, a thoughtful look coming over his face.

Seth quirked a brow, but decided to play along. He nodded. "Yes, you could," he agreed grudgingly. Ra, he could use an assistant himself.

Atemu nodded decisively. "Then I shall make it so. Find one from among all those…gifts…I've received," he ordered Seth. The practice of slavery was centuries old, but that didn't mean he had to like it. Egypt had moved away from actual slavery since the reign of Rameses, and while the peasantry was still poor, the royal family did not own any of their subjects.

Unfortunately, certain foreign governments still thought slaves were the perfect all-purpose gift for other royals. Coronation? Give them a slave. Wedding? A concubine for when the honeymoon was over. Funeral? A faithful companion to be by the side of the grieving family.

Ugh.

"He'd need to be able to read," Seth pointed out. "Otherwise we couldn't give him written instructions." Left unsaid was the fact that the messenger 'boy' could, in fact, have been female, but most of the female slaves were either kitchen workers – which a palace could never have enough of; a monarchy could rise or fall on the basis of their serving staff – or bed slaves. Bed slaves were notorious for knowing one hundred and one ways to drive you insane with pleasure, but they were terrible conversationalists, mostly because, even though they might have been **born** intelligent, said intelligence had not been cultivated.

And the gleam of intelligence in the eyes of Atemu's double was yet another reason Seth thought the boy had never been trained to be a bed slave.

"Then start with the pleasure slaves," Atemu suggested.

This brought a look of dubious incredulity to Seth's face. "You can't be serious, sire?" he half-asked. This boy, he could understand, but some of the others currently in the harem…

Atemu shook his head, a lopsided smile on his face. "Nope. Things are so crazy around here, that if any of the slaves can read, it'll most likely be one of the pleasure slaves."

Seth could admit, if only to himself, that perhaps his cousin had a point. Pharaoh Akunumkanon's reign had been one of strained tension with both the peasants and foreign governments. The palace workings had, however, been very predictable. Atemu's reign was characterized by being **un**predictable, but the peasants had never been happier, and trade with Libia, Greece, and Rome had never been better.

"Ano…I can read," the amethyst-eyed version of the Pharaoh mumbled.

He looked anxious about drawing attention to himself, but there was enough resolve in his quickly-lowered gaze to give Atemu hope. This so-called 'pleasure slave' wasn't a doormat, as so many were. He had spirit, but no arrogance.

The act that he looked like his younger brother was a bonus; not many would argue with the Pharaoh's personal messenger, when said messenger was a dead ringer for the Pharaoh himself, ne?

Atemu's eyebrow rose into his tri-colored spiked hair. "Is that so?" he asked, careful to project interest and not doubtfulness in his tone. This young boy had a strong spirit, he could tell, but as scared as he was, it would need to be nurtured with kindness for a while before he could blossom.

Atemu wasn't the nicest of people, but compared to his High Priest he was a kitten.

If Mana's newest 'pet' could be considered a kitten…

"Y-yes, your highness," the boy responded, nervously, but firmly, and with no trace of deceit in his voice.

If he were lying, he'd soon be found out anyway.

Atemu nodded, pleased with this sign of resolve on the younger boy's part. "What's your name, boy?" he asked, almost as an afterthought. Atemu berated himself for the mental slip – he hadn't learned the names of all the other bed slaves he'd been gifted with, but that was only because there were so many of them, and he hadn't actually interacted with them – he'd have to be more careful in the future.

"Yugi, your highness," the boy replied, sketching a graceful, if rough bow.

Atemu smiled a slow, sincere smile. 'Yugi' meant 'Game'. As he was the King of Games, this seemed very serendipitous. "Yugi, I think this is going to be the start of a grand relationship." Seeing the hint of fear in Yugi's violet eyes, he rolled his own ruby orbs. "A **professional** relationship," he clarified.

Yugi blushed and smiled back with tentative sheepishness. He remained silent about his worries, however. Somehow, he had a feeling 'grand' wasn't the right word.

'Weird' seemed to fit better.


	6. Slave To Insanity

**Slave To Insanity**

**

* * *

**

"Atem!"

Atemu, Pharaoh of all Egypt, looked up wearily from the papyrus scrolls he was going over with his High Priest, Seth. Well, by himself now, since Seth, for some reason – mostly likely that idiot thief Bakura – had deserted him over a candlemark ago… He hated having to deal with matters of state – there was nothing more boring in his opinion – but it had to be done. And by him, since he was the Pharaoh (though as his High Priest, it was Seto's job to advise him on the most important matters).

However, all due hospitality must be extended to visiting monarchs…

Smiling widely, Atemu shoved the pile of scrolls away and rose from his chair, striding over to greet Mai, Queen of the Egyptian Amazons. He clasped her arm in a warrior's grip, and was unsurprised to find himself pulled into a fierce hug. Mai may have been an Amazon, but she was a bit more feminine than most, and her physical expressions of affection were legendary at court.

Well, at least one was – she'd tongue-kissed Seth at Atemu's coronation reception. The uproar from him slapping her and her subsequent kicking of his ass had yet to die down six months later.

Knowing what he did now of his cousin's relationship with his arch nemesis, Atemu considered Mai lucky to have escaped Bakura's wrath. Then again, though the tomb thief was rather on the insane side, he **might** have been intelligent enough not to get on Mai's bad side…

"What are you doing here?" Atemu asked once Mai turned loose of him. "It's great to see you, but you've never made a habit of dropping in unannounced," he explained at her raised eyebrow.

"Well, since I didn't have time to get you anything for your coronation, I thought it was better late than never, Atemu," Mai replied with a smile.

"It seems that Queen Mai has brought you a…gift…sire," Seth added from behind the matriarch in question, eyes sparking with mischievous intent.

And apparently his High Priest had managed to find his way back to throne room, albeit only to escort Mai there. Atemu got the feeling that his plan to spend the afternoon relaxing in the palace baths was going to be shot to the Shadow Realm.

Fifteen minutes later his throne room was full of people – Mai's younger sister the Princess Edina, his and Seth's younger brother Prince Mokuba (of course, they were best friends, even if he was not as enamored of her as she of him), young Mana and her babysitter for the day, Jounochi's younger sister Shizuka…

Not to mention Mai's honor guard of half a dozen Amazon warriors that protocol demanded she bring with her to any foreign court (Atemu considered himself privileged to be Mai's friend; other royals had been subjected to a full two dozen), and one very odd-looking and dirty young man in chains.

Odd-looking in that, while bearing the darkened skin of an Egyptian, he had hair as flaxen gold as wheat. For a moment Atemu shivered, reminded of the palace executioner (whose services he had not had to utilize in his reign thus far, thank all the Gods) Marik, whose appearance was eerily similar. Anxious to dispel the pall that had settled over his nerves, Atemu affected a jovial tone and asked of his visitor, "And who might this be?"

"He says his name is Malik," Mai replied. She grimaced and made a noise of disgust. "And that's all he's said in the past week other than various invectives and imprecations about my lineage." She smiled toothily at the man in question, who didn't even blink his dark violet eyes. "I took him off the hands of a slave trader as the toll for passing through Amazon lands." Mai bared her teeth in a menacing grin. "That obsequious little worm is lucky that I allowed him to live."

Atemu cringed for effect and nodded. This was part of the reason Queen Mai and Pharaoh Atemu were such faithful allies – neither of them believed in slavery, and both had outlawed in their respective realms.

The one called 'Malik' scowled at the byplay. "You may own my body – but my mind is my own," he declared with scathing glare at all assembled.

Jerking her head towards the blond, Mai gave Atemu a look. "See? He's got spirit, that one. It'd take more time than I want to spend to break him – and I don't particularly want to, anyway. So I'm giving him to you."

Malik growled, mumbling something about, 'I'll break you, bitch – you'll break me over my dead body.'

Seto folded his arms across his chest and eyed Malik up and down, sniffing in a vaguely disgusted manner as if he found the other man wanting. Which he probably did. "A **used** gift?" he murmured, incensed.

Mai rolled her eyes, a smirk on her lips.

Atemu blinked, surprised. "To me?"

Mirth lighting her lavender eyes, Mai nodded. "I never did get you a coronation present," she reminded him.

"But what would I do with him?" Atemu asked, at a loss. Since his coronation he'd received a plethora of new palace personnel. He would have much preferred some tacky statuary that could be easily broken and/or misplaced or, even better, some foreign chocolates that would be happily devoured by himself alone. Instead he ended up with even more mouths to feed and bodies to clothe, people who could barely take care of themselves, let alone be of use around the palace.

Edina paused in her game of Sennet with Mana and spoke up. "I thought that Pharaohs could always use more servants?"

Atemu groaned and slumped down in his throne, burying his face in his hands. "Do you have any idea how many such 'gifts' I've received since my coronation?" he asked rhetorically, voice muffled by his hands. "The harem is overflowing with beautiful untrained pleasure slaves that I have no use for, the kitchen is overflowing with slaves who've been trained to cook exotic delicacies but can't manage to make a simple koshari, the barracks have over two dozen men – and three women – who've been trained as deadly assassins but can't wield a sword or a bow and arrow. What in the name of Amun am I supposed to do with **him**?" he demanded, gesturing to the blond.

Malik snorted and swatted away a fly buzzing about his head with one manacled hand. "You could let me get cleaned up," he suggested. "I haven't bathed in weeks."

Seth chuckled softly at the poleaxed expression on his majesty's face. "That sounds like a good idea, my lord."He sniffed pointedly. "He is rather…fragrant."

Atemu rolled his eyes. "Fine, fine, whatever." He looked around, his eyes lighting up as they came upon a young redhead in the corner. "Shizuka!" he called.

"My Pharaoh?" said the girl, looking up from her mending.

"See to our…guest, would you?" Atemu grumbled, gesturing to the chained blond. "He needs to be cleaned up. And see if you can round him up some new clothes, also? He looks about your brother's size, maybe you can dress him in Jou's old things."

Shizuka nodded and walked over to stand next to Malik. She looked him up and down, frowning as she took in the sight of the chains. "Ah…my lord?" she asked tentatively.

"Yes?" Atemu asked distractedly.

"What about the chains?" she asked. "The metal will make him sink in the bathing pool. I'm not strong enough to keep him afloat."

Turning to Mai, a tired expression on his face, Atemu asked, "I don't suppose you have a key to those manacles?"

Mai shook her head, looking ever-so-slightly regretful. "Sorry, no. I wasn't given one."

Atemu sighed and pinched his nose between his thumb and forefinger. "I'm getting a headache," he complained."Can nothing go right today?"

Seth pursed his lips. "Perhaps I should ask Ryou to get his brother to help," he offered in his best attempt at diplomacy.

Atemu's face darkened. "Bakura," he growled, making the word sound as if it was a synonym for 'shit.'

Mai raised one blonde brow. "Bakura?" she asked, interest in her voice. "The Thief King?"

Atemu sighed and nodded. "He's my brother-in-law."

Mai blinked. "Ooookay."

Seth sighed. "But he is a thief, my lord, and should be able to pick the locks."

Atemu snorted. "Knowing my luck, while he was here, he'd make off with a lot of the palace statuary."

Shizuka cocked a brow. "I thought you hated the palace decorations, sire," she said dryly. "Said that they were too stuffy."

"That's beside the point," Atemu grumbled. "It's the principle of the thing."

Shizuka rolled her eyes. "Men," she scoffed under her breath. "All of them are insane."

Mai hid a smile."You get used to it after awhile, dear."

Quirking a brow, Shizuka asked, "You do?"

"Well…no," Mai admitted. "I am an Amazon, after all."

Shizuka heaved a sigh. "Oh, well. Things can't get any worse."

In her chambers on the far side of the palace, Ishuzu, the Palace Seer, winced. "Ohh, bad move, sister. Never say something like that where the Gods can hear…"


	7. A Little Chaos Goes A Long Way

**A Little Chaos Goes A Long Way**

* * *

The Gods had heard, all right. Specifically each and everyone having to do with either family or chaos.

It was amazing how closely related those two things were during Pharaoh Atemu's reign. Set had been heard laughing his head off, which had set the younger deities of the Egyptian pantheon to quaking in fear.

If they only knew… But then, a lack of knowledge had been what had started the whole thing. Malik had been kidnapped and sold into slavery because no one had known he was the son of a chief and a handsome random could have been paid for him. Mai had chosen to give him to Pharaoh Atemu because he was 'uppity' for his 'station in life' and thought he would amuse. Malik had chosen to finish his **un**assisted bath before plotting ways to escape his captivity, not knowing that the Palace Seer, Ishuzu, was good friends with his 'tour guide' Shizuka, the Palace Seamstress, and was watching his every move.

And not even Ishuzu had foreseen that Malik would arrive, bringing chaos with him in his wake. For, it so happened, that Malik was Ishuzu's younger brother, taken from their small village along with their older brother in a raid by bandits. Ishuzu had sought out the job of Palace Seer for the Pharaoh in hopes that her visions of finding her lost family in the heart of Kemet would come true.

So they had, that very day. Halfway, at any rate.

So Malik had postponed his escape plans from the palace, and had spent the past week trying to escape his overprotective, overbearing, stifling presence of his sister.

By any means necessary.

Even…horrors of horrors…by doing laundry.

"Is everyone around here insane?" Malik demanded as the third serving boy in as many candle marks jumped into the soapy laundry pool. The boy then proceeded to wash both himself and his loincloth with brisk motions before climbing out of the pool, shaking himself off, and running back to work. Just like the last two had.

Shizuka shrugged. The serving boys only served at state occasions, so at all other times they were put into use as kitchen help. And Pegasus, the Head palace Chef, was a little…eccentric. He was always trying out new and odd dishes that sometimes exploded spectacularly, coating the serving boys and causing them to need a bath. "It's possible," she allowed. "But mostly I think people have just given up things ever being what the commoners term 'normal' and…accepted it."

"Accepted the craziness?" Malik demanded, eyes and voice flat.

Nodding with enthusiasm, bright red hair bouncing beneath her beaded veil, Shizuka smiled. "Yes! Isn't it wonderful?"

­_The girl must be touched in the head._ Malik scowled and returned to helping his…guide…fold laundry. He would have tried to escape – though it appeared it wouldn't have been that hard; most of the guards were trying to keep people **out**, not in – but Shizuka had made a rather intelligent point.

"Why leave?" she'd asked. "You don't have anywhere to go, and it's not like Pharaoh Atemu isn't a good and kind man. He'll let you live here, clothe you, feed you, find you a job to keep you out from underfoot… Doesn't that sound better than living on the streets?"

Malik had had to concede that she had a point.

If it wasn't for the 'perks' of being a palace servant, and his sister being there, Malik would have left, however. The place was just too crazy for him.

And he's heard rumors that the Palace Executioner looked exactly like him! Hopefully, he wasn't as demented as everyone else seemed to be…


	8. Clueless Outside Cairo

**Clueless Outside Cairo**

* * *

He was tall, shoulders broad as an ox, skin bronzed by the sun, with a thin tail of coal-black hair. His eyes were a dark brown, and they were filled with controlled menace.

A calculated **antipathy** for the man, the **Pharaoh**, in front of him.

"Who **are** you?" Atemu asked with a sigh, trying to stem the raging headache he felt developing.

"Odion," the man replied in a low voice. It was the first word he'd spoken since Atemu had arrived.

"And why are you here?" Atemu hoped against hope that he'd finally get someone where this…person. He didn't even know why Odion was there; he'd received word that Bakura had arrived, and had gone to his throne room to with the single-minded purpose of making sure his brother-in-law stayed for as short a visit as possible, only to find this…Odion chained to the foot of his throne. As he didn't have the key, he couldn't very well let the other man loose.

And he wouldn't, until he figured out if the other man was dangerous to him or not. Odion certainly seemed to be hostile.

"The…Thief King…brought me," Odion said slowly, and Atemu carefully cultivated his expression not to give away his shock. Mai brought him Malik as a late coronation present, and now Bakura…

Why **did** Bakura bring him a…man?

"Why?" Atemu replied, eyebrows knitting into a furrow.

"I had been informed that my…brother…was here," Odion said.

"Your brother?" Atemu asked with dawning dread. This could not end well, he just knew it.

"His name is Malik." Odion dipped his head in a now and slipped back into his brooding silence.

Atemu sighed, and sent his doppelganger page for Seth…and, against his better judgment, Malik. It wasn't as if he could keep the man from his family, no matter how much chaos relatives could cause.

Or maybe that was just his relatives. Seth had been driving him to distraction since he'd attained his new position of High Priest, and he took smug satisfaction in seeming to know **everything**. Presumably he was would have some clue as to what was going on here, with this influx of…related people.

That was, if he wasn't still in the Cairo Bazaar trying to track down a birthday gift for his…for Bakura.

Atemu sighed once more, and prayed for guidance from whichever god took pity on him to answer his prayers.


	9. If It's Not One King, It's A Mother

**If It's Not One King, It's A Mother**

* * *

The palace was in an uproar.

Barely half a season past the time when the Palace Seer Ishuzu had been reunited with her long lost brothers, the three Ishtars had settled in and become a part of palace life as if they'd always been there.

That, however, had been the last 'normal' thing that had happened at the heart of Kemet.

Ishuzu, giddy over finally finding her family after all those years, had drunk a bit too much of the spring wine Queen Mai had brought with her on her latest visit. So had Mai. The two of them had ended up sharing a bed and various other places in Ishuzu's rooms for the rest of Mai's stay.

Mai came to visit a lot more after that.

Atemu had made good use of Yugi as his personal page, and his young look-alike was finally loosening up and had stopped fearing for his life. That might have had more to do with his growing friendship with one of the Palace dancers, Anzu.

Atemu was all for it, as now that the young one wasn't scraping and bowing to his every whim, he could actually get a moment to himself now and again. If only those moments didn't so often involve Shadow Games against young upstarts vying for his kingdom, his throne, or even his crown.

That last he'd gladly give them, if only so he wouldn't have to wear the heavy eyesore.

Shizuka had quickly taken young Malik under her wing, and he appeared quite taken with her in return. A wedding had been predicted by Ishuzu for the following summer, though she couldn't say for certain, since it was only a possibility.

The only one not pleased with the events was Marik, the Palace Executioner. It wasn't that he wanted the young seamstress for himself; it was that he hadn't had anyone to kill lately and wanted to take his anger out on the happiest person around. Shizuka, with her perpetual bubbly personality, was a favored target. Without such a focus for his ire, he'd taken to causing…mischief…around the palace.

Needless to say, the possibility of random acts of senseless violence being performed on hapless victims, such as annoying flies divested of their wings, or meek pages of their loincloths…well, that had proven as more than a possibility.

Far beyond possibly and into the land of certainty, however, were Ryou and Kisara. Back from their honeymoon for over a season, they'd settled easily back into their previous lives at the palace, Kisara the perfect young princess towards nobles visiting the land of Egypt, and Ryou the elegant artist whose company was often sought for after dinner conversation about his work. Not only were his designs around the palace proper aesthetically pleasing to the eye, but they also incorporated very heavy protective magics.

Said protective magics tended to have a side effect, however. One that caused strange things to happen to those they protected, unleashing irony upon those who had been saved from worser fates.

The Fates, themselves, were cackling over the latest development in Pharaoh Atemu's court.

Kisara was pregnant. And the babe that would be born to her…well, let it just be said that the those from the land of Chin were not the only ones destined to live in interesting times.

Within the next year, the arrival of a bouncing bundle of trouble was set to happen, as was the possibility of a wedding between one of the palace seamstress's and the new apprentice to the Palace Engineer. Also, Queen Mai had mentioned to her love the need to designate an heir in case young Edina did follow through on her threats to marry young prince Mokuba. It would be simplest to adopt Kisara to her clan, and have hers and Ryou's as yet unborn child being the continuance of the royal line, but alas, in order for her to be accepted as an Amazon, Kisara would have to live among them for a year, and neither she nor her husband – or her brothers – were agreeable.

Ishuzu had suggested a conception spell, borrowing her brother to be the father of Mai's child. Mai had admitted that the idea had merit. Malik wasn't so fond of the idea; Odion, however, was ever willing to serve.

As for Odion, he still needed to find a job around the palace beyond looming threateningly behind skinflint merchants when they were haggling over prices of goods with the Pharaoh. It was useful for Atemu, but boring for Odion.

The next year should prove to have more than one weird thing happening in the court of Yu-Gi-Oh, and not just in games.


	10. Disturbances In The Emotional Force

**Disturbances In The Emotional Force**

* * *

They were disturbingly domestic.

Disturbing because they fit so well together.

When Otogi Ryuji, the self-proclaimed – but never otherwise contested or denied – Lord of the Dance, had arrived from the land of Eire on a scouting mission to acquire the head Palace Dancer, Anzu, for his troupe of players, the Pharaoh had, of course, granted him an audience.

He'd postponed it three times trying to get Seth to help him figured out how to let Anzu make her own decision, but to subtly manipulate circumstances in such a way so that she didn't leave the palace. She and his young look-alike had grown very close; Atemu was unsure if it was a sibling-like relationship or something more romantic, but he knew that Yugi was slowly starting to come out of his shell, and if she left, his personal messenger would be down in the dumps.

And that wouldn't be good.

Also, Otogi Ryuuji was **annoying**. He was loud, flamboyant, talked in a really odd drawling accent, made over-the-top sweeping gestures and talked with his hands. A lot.

Also, he tended to wear dresses. Not long kilts or loincloths, dresses. Add to that the make-up, his long and intricate hairstyle, his deadly accuracy with both words and knives, and the entire court was a bit…flummoxed by him.

Not as much as they might have been, had this been anything other than Pharaoh Atemu's court, however. He was the King of Games, but most people had already started referring to his reign as the Reign of Chaos.

Chaos which touched everyone who even set foot inside the palace for a single instant.

When Ryuji had finally met the self-styled, but not just self-titled King of Games, he had been outraged at what he had perceived as unsubtle procrastination on the monarch's part. He had quickly made his displeasure known, not bothering to give the Morning Star the respect Ryuuji felt he **didn't** deserve for being so boorish and rude.

Sparks had flown between the two as they shouted the palace down. Then fists had flown as well as words, followed quickly by the tow of them wrestling around on the pillows piled in front of the throne. Surprisingly, the wrestling had soon turned to…wrestling with intent.

Intent to get their clothes off and get as close as it was possible for two separate beings to be.

Needless to say, when Shizuka arrived to summon the two for dinner, she had been in for quite a shock. Not entirely a bad one, however; the arousing sight led to her pouncing her boyfriend Malik within a half-candlemark.

With Kisara and Ryou having gone to bed early – and yes, just to sleep; Kisara was very tired from her pregnancy – that just left four men, two couples, in the large, palatial dining room.

And since there were no visiting dignitaries, none of them had to stand on ceremony of eating any slower than the speed of a sand storm, devouring everything in its path.

Jou let out a loud belch. "What's keepin' Atemu?"

Honda shrugged and nicked the last slight of date cake from under Seth's questing fingers. "Probably still 'discussing' things with that theater guy."

Seth glared at the both of them for their lack of manners. "Whatever my lord Pharaoh may or may not be discussing with that tart Ryuuji is none of our business."

Snorting, Jou swallowed his mouthful of rice pudding and said, "'Course it is. If this Ryuuji jerk is bein'…well, a jerk…then Honda and I, as the Pharaoh's Royal Guard, need ta teach him some manners."

"More likely you just need to teach Atemu better ways of flirting than annoying the object of his affection," Honda replied shrewdly.

About to argue against that – Atemu would never go for anyone so…uncouth – Seth's eyes went as wide as his dropped jaw as a loud shout ricocheted off the walls. It sounded eerily like his bother's voice…

But not in pain?

Elsewhere, in the Shadow Realm, Hathor snickered with Amaunet. It seemed that Isis had finally gotten around to fulfilling her threat of meddling in Atemu's love life.


	11. Curses From The Orient

**Curses From The Orient**

* * *

It was small, brown, and shriveled. At first glance, it looked like nothing so much as a piece of dried dung.

Upon second glance, it was just as disturbing, but more terrifying. It looked like a human hand. One missing a finger.

Otogi Ryuuji, who had been to more foreign lands than most people had teeth, informed all the comers that it was, in fact, a monkey's paw. If anyone uttered a wish around it, the monkey's paw would be granted in the most unusual, and oft-times most annoying and occasionally downright painful way possible.

And someone had given the monkey's paw to Marik, the Royal Executioner. The most insane man in the history of the palace. Which, considering the stories still told to that very day about the late, not so great, Ethelfride, Uncle to one of the first Pharaohs in recorded history, was very insane.

Ethelride had been most commonly known for dressing as a woman and dancing around the palace grounds on feast days. He'd been less commonly known for holding conversations with the crocodiles in the moat, and summoning hoards of Kuriboh to annoy the palace populace when he was feeling particularly playful.

Mana chewed anxiously on her lower lip and hid behind Mokuba as he approached the clutch of people gathered around Atemu's throne to discuss the latest happenings in the palace.

"Does Marik know how the monkeys paw works?" Mokuba asked. If he didn't, maybe they could arrange for him to 'lose' it, and no one need fear anything.

"Unfortunately, yes," Seto said. "He's insane, not incompetent or stupid." Which was the only reason he still held his job.

Well, that, and the Pharaoh not actually having any executed since Marik had been appointed to his position. Atemu seemed willing to continue in that vein. He had a strange attachment to the idea that 'all human life is sacred.'

Balderdash. But try telling his brother that.

"So…what did he wish for?" Malik asked, voice filled with worry and curiosity in equal measure.

Anzu curved her lips up in an expression halfway between a bemused smile and a smirk. "Marik is insane. His work as the Royal executioner is helped by the fact that he always knows how to find someone's deepest fears. However, he has no fears of his own."

"So he wished for one," Shizuka told her lover. "And I…fear what might happen," she said, fretfully nibbling on the ends of her gold-lacquered fingernails.

Malik blinked, trying to take in the knowledge that his look-alike had made such a potentially volatile wish. He really must have been insane. "What is he afraid of now?" he asked, feeling trepidation well up inside himself.

Anzu snickered and pointed toward the parade of multi-colored, floppy-eared, all shapes and sizes, bunnies that were hopping past.

Mokuba sighed as he watched the rabbits hop past, fearing exactly what his elder brother's reaction would be to yet another one of his coronation gifts being put to such use. There hadn't been any rabbits in Egypt…at least until the envoy from Aussa, the Land Down Under, had sent some called 'jack rabbits.' They had quickly taken over the unpopulated regions of the desert and had propagated with extreme swiftness. "At least Marik didn't end up afraid of sand."

"Or kitties," Mana added, reaching up with one hand to stroke the back of her pet panther.

Mokuba did his best not to let Bastia smell his fear. "Yeah, or kitties."


End file.
